the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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