Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Randomize
