glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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