Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
