sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
