Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
