: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
