marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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