you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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