So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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