hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
