Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
