DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
