I want to stick my p in your. b.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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