How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
