I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
