Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
