Dual....:-)
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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