You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
