This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize