Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
