I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
