Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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