We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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