I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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