Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
pray to the hookup gods
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
