Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
