her vagine was all disorganized.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Randomize
