so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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