Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
