I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
