Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
