I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Randomize
