wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
