girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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