You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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