You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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