Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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