my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
She even gives head with a lisp.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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