i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
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