Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
