I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
