On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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