I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
