i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
