my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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