All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
