im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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