you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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