Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
